21 reasons to hate kids If I were to pick up a pencil and repeatedly try to stab my little sister eyes out, or start hitting my head against the wall because someone wouldn give me a biscuit, you could justifiably call me a dick to my face.
Apparently you can do that to kids. Oh, come on, how hard is coach outlet handbags brahmin it to say morning Not very. If coach outlet purses name tags Wayne Rooney can say it, you should be able to say it. 3. They have to be the centre of attention all the time Combine the humbleness of Kimye, the modesty of Justin Bieber and the subtlety of Arnold Schwarzenegger and you basically got the personality of a very shy child. 4. They tell the truth all the time Everyone else knows that you don call a fat, smelly person a fat, smelly person to their face, especially if you have to share a packed train with them for an hour and a half. Except kids. 5. Their parties are always better than yours Despite the fact they one and will have no memory of the event AT ALL, they still get a 25 cake, a table full of presents and a garden full of friends who, when they piss in the pool or are sick in someone hair, get tolerant smiles instead of being ejected. I can do whatever I want (Picture: windcatcher) 6. They get the best parking spaces Well their parents do, anyway. Not all of classic coach bags outlet them, but quite a lot of them. Quite a lot of babies, in particular, emerge looking like a cross between a potato and ET. Tip: Maybe don say this to new mums. But that a good thing, isn it? No, not when little George way of not fitting in is to repeatedly take his clothes off in public and start grabbing his winkie in front of total strangers. You just spent the last 12 hours running around after them, intercepting them on their way to sharp objects, distracting them from getting upset about coach outlet coupons eastbay the fact their blankie is in the wash by singing jolly songs and basically saving their life from electrocution, drowning and/or choking. Their response at the end of the day? To scream at you for trying to inflict a milky drink, a story and a soft bed on them. 11. They basically hate other kids You know those saps who say things like isn it lovely to see children playing These people have very poor eyesight. Which brings me to They violent. So violent No amount of giving Barbies or tea sets to the little darlings will change the fact that all some of them really want to do is run around hitting other kids. I smiling because I just pushed three other little boys off the park swing because it mine (Picture: Adam Petto) 13. They talk crap in public Not as in stupid things (although God knows they do that as well). ACTUAL crap. As in did that man just have a poo? They crap in public Though the only thing worse than them talking about poo is when they a little problem in the freezer aisle of Sainsbury They expect you to drop everything for them RIGHT NOW So you have to file some copy by 5pm, or ring your elderly grandma to check she still alive or, I don know, actually give birth. This is not important. What IS important is downloading Fireman Sam for the 5,000th time and singing the theme tune. Actually sick. Not had a cold in a while? Just go visit a playground and you be bed ridden for weeks. 17.
They always like the box best You just spent 50 on the latest gadget which the woman in John Lewis said all the kids wanted. Except the kid you bought it for. That kid will merrily throw your gift in the bin and then spend two hours putting small cars in and out of the box.
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